Chances are, you are familiar with “the Karen meme.” Often used to refer to middle-aged women who behave in an entitled and irritated fashion, this term can be both offensive and insulting.
Karen is often associated with women who are rude or aggressive towards customer service workers, according to studies conducted. A recent investigation discovered that people named Karen were more likely to make complaints than other name people.
1. Don’t get angry.
Karens have become a running joke on the internet, with numerous memes depicting them blocking people out of parking spots or screaming at retail workers about return policies. Additionally, Karens are frequently targeted online as social media users use this term to refer to women who appear demanding or entitled. It has even been extended to describe celebrities or pets.
Karen first emerged in 2017 through an online subreddit and has become a slang word to refer to a self-centered middle-aged woman who behaves aggressively petty. This stereotype usually depicts as white with a bob haircut arguing or belittling service employees while demanding to speak with her manager over things that could easily be resolved without her interference.
Though commonly associated with complaining, not all Karens are the same. A study by customer feedback software provider Bionic analyzed over one million reviews to identify which women (and men) were most likely to act like Karens based on gender, age, name and other variables. They used gender identification software as well as age prediction to predict which individuals would escalate an issue to management or post a negative review on sites like Yelp or Facebook.
The results were somewhat surprising: while Karens were indeed among the leading complainers, Louise and Ann also ranked higher than them on this list of complaint makers; researchers discovered that women with these names – Louise in particular – made nearly twice as many complaints than Karen. Women with other names like Lisa or Emma were much less likely to lodge complaints.
2. Don’t argue.
Associating with someone who thinks the world revolves around them can be very trying and draining, often with an entitlement that makes you want to lash out in frustration. Unfortunately, such people have become so prevalent that we now refer to them by name: Karens are those who feel entitled to everything, thinking everything should cater to them according to their needs – they will often argue over trivial issues while labelling everyone she doesn’t like as liars!
Whenever possible, avoid conflicts with Karens in your life. These people tend to seek attention by engaging in arguments; arguing will only escalate matters further and could turn violent – it is best if you avoid engaging.
Karens are women who believe they are entitled to certain privileges and can complain about almost anything without consequence, usually white, middle-aged and well-off. The term first made its debut on the website Reddit as an insult against self-indulgent women who act self-absorbed and complain excessively; over time this term has gained wider usage within meme culture and become widely-used slang term to refer to overly assertive and demanding women.
Karen can be challenging to deal with because of her tendency to point fingers and blame others, yet still maintain a sense of entitlement. There are ways to deal with Karen more successfully; first is not engaging her directly as this will only escalate her anger; second is simply not engaging at all – eventually she may lose interest and move onto someone else.
3. Don’t give up.
Karens are an entitled and rude breed of individuals who expect things to go their own way. These people may be sexist, racist, ageist or both – often acting like their opinions are the only ones that matter. These Karens use anger as an escape valve and refuse to recognize other perspectives as valid viewpoints.
As “Karen” has become more prevalent, those born with that name have felt compelled to defend it from being denigrated; unfortunately, this only served to further isolate themselves from society; becoming the face of a racist, sexist and ageist meme in doing so.
When confronted by Karen, it is essential that you remain calm. Her actions are the ones at fault and it is best not to get drawn into any unnecessary arguments with her. Be open-minded toward her concerns while explaining your viewpoint but don’t allow yourself to get drawn into petty disputes between Karen and you.
Karen will likely never change. She does not seek compromise or resolution of conflicts; she prefers being right and will take whatever means necessary – including harassing others online and making threats of legal action – in order to achieve it.
Bionic, a company offering customer service analytics, conducted a massive analysis of over one million reviews from Trustpilot – the world’s most popular review platform – in an attempt to understand what makes someone like Karen tick. They then identified top complainters by name in order to pinpoint where and when their behavior most closely matched those associated with Karens; additionally they researched countries with the highest concentrations of Karens; they typically occur in female-dominated work settings.
4. Don’t be defensive.
Have you encountered someone who believes the world owes them something? From bigoted, aggressive or angry individuals to bossy bosses quick to escalate a disagreement into high-stakes arguments; such entitled individuals are so commonplace they even have their own name: Karens.
Karens can easily be recognized by their dramatic, high-stakes emotional breakdowns that often end up going viral videos. They’re the people who demand to speak with the manager when their waiter botches their order or report neighbors for having barking dogs; those who use their privilege to bully minority groups and service staffers, expecting others to accede to their demands or give them special treatment.
Karens often view everything through an egocentric lens, making it hard for them to see things from another viewpoint. Furthermore, they’re usually unwilling to compromise and often escalate situations into high-stakes confrontations; such as refusing to sign traffic tickets as this somehow absolves them of responsibility and guilt.
Though it can be tempting to label someone as Karen after witnessing them behave this way in public, you should take care not to jump to conclusions too quickly. Perhaps they’re simply experiencing an off day and need an outlet; or there might be an underlying issue at play that needs addressed immediately. Image Flair Academy of Modern Etiquette founder Eunice Tan suggests that if someone frequently complains or disputes with others they might suffer from an insecurity or low self-esteem issue.
5. Don’t be a victim.
Victim mentalities, also referred to as victim complexes or internal locus of control issues, occur when individuals believe that other people and events are to blame for their life circumstances. This negative outlook robs victims of their personal power and can lead to behavioral problems like anxiety, depression, narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), addiction or any form of self-sabotage.
Victims tend to struggle accepting responsibility for their thoughts and behaviors, often depending on others to help make them feel better about themselves and bolster their exaggerated sense of victimhood. Furthermore, it’s common for victims to play martyr to garner sympathy – an approach which can become very draining on loved ones.
People suffering from victim mentality often have difficulty making decisions and taking actions, and may not realize how their negative thinking is sabotaging their lives. Although victim mentality may have originated as an acquired behavior from trauma or difficult periods in their lives, they don’t need to continue down this path.
Although compassion and empathy for those going through hard times is vital, we shouldn’t allow them to remain trapped in an endless cycle of victim mentality that undermines both their health and relationships. Help them see that there are choices they can make and actions they can take in order to turn things around and reverse the current situation.
Change a person’s perspective can be difficult, but it is possible. Focus on what they enjoy instead of what is missing – gratitude is a great way to achieve this effect and can be instrumental in breaking up victim mindsets.
